Out of Sorts With Myself

Do you know one of the worst feelings in the world? To be out of sorts with yourself. It's so uncomfortable to not feel yourself. I'm used to feeling myself. I like feeling like myself. I like who I am. When I feel pessimistic or grumpy or lethargic, of course I feel I'm unhappy. Then I feel doubly unhappy, because I'm not used to feeling that way and I don't like it. I like to feel hopeful and cheerful and energetic. I like my usual self.

So, I'm out of sorts with myself, and have been for a couple of months. And I don't know what to do about it. Some days it's worse than other days. Today, I mostly just feel tired (I had a HUGE work event that's kept me away from posting and away from relaxing, but thankfully, it went well and it's over). So today's not that bad. But some days, I really feel not like myself. I don't know what makes one day different from the other - and that also bothers me.

I have a friend though, that would say those other emotions I'm experiencing are still me and that I shouldn't dismiss them. She would say they are just a different side of me. I ponder over that sometimes. Is it still me when I feel sad and doubting? Is it part of me to feel low energy and apathetic? Is it still me to feel unhappy with my body? Is it me, when I'm used to feeling confident and assured that everything will work out?

If it is me, it's a me I'm not comfortable with. Then that makes me wonder if I should work on being okay with that? Or just being present to it and waiting for it to pass? Or something else?

I can see the post isn't going to lead to any answers. And if my mother is reading, don't worry Mom - it's not as bad as it sounds. I'm doing fine. Just sorting out my selves.

But, I'm sure tomorrow will be better. =)

Baby #13 for Our Family

Ta-da! Daniel Travis Sunukjian made his grand entrance on September 8th, 2010 (he shares a birthday with Aunt Sheila!). Gina and Daniel are already home and doing great. Ian and I got to see him last night and he is so cute! He looks like a grumpy old man and has so many awesome wrinkles. I laughed and laughed at all his faces last night. Congrats to David and Gina!

And yes, you read that right. Daniel is our 8th nephew and with our 5 nieces, we have 13 precious children to call us Uncle and Aunt! How blessed we are!

Our First Family Gathering

It's official. Our house is a home. We've had my whole side of the family, plus Heather, Rob and Rowan, over all at the same time (that's 26 people, little people included). I feel like the house has been christened. We had Labor Day at our house to celebrate Ian, Sheila and Eric's birthdays. It was a great time and it gave me tremendous joy to have all my people over to our house at the same time.

I was a tad worried that the kids might be bored, since there isn't as much to do at our house as at Grandma and Grandpa's, but I believe we bought our way to success, with the pool, sidewalk chalk, balls and our real ringer - the swing.

Here are some of the darling children lined up (they organized this themselves) to wait for Paul to give them a turn.


Here is Kara, so excited to be next in line, and Sam, just getting off from his great adventure.

My mom said we needed an age limit, but I didn't want to keep any of the kiddos from using it, so I assured her it was fine. But then we saw this:

Maybe an age limit would be a good idea...but it seemed to hold Eric no problem. And it was his party, so how could I tell him no?

All around, it was a great day. However, I will probably go down in Sunukjian Family Lore for one of the most unromantic birthday gifts (up there with the steak knives my dad gave my mom and the toilet seat Peter gave Sheila). I gave Ian a trash bag holder - you know, the kind you can set up in your lawn and put the big black plastic trash bag over so that your bag stays open and upright while you load leaves, grass, etc. It's really a very handy tool, but yes, woefully unromantic. But he also got movies, a satchel, and very cool loafers from me, which are more in the acceptable realm of b-day gifts. So say what you will - it was a good gift.

So Excited for a Birthday That's Not Mine

Monday is Ian's birthday. As always, I'm WAY more excited about it than he is. I love birthdays and I love thinking of ways to show Ian that I love him. We've got lots of fun plans for the weekend and I can't wait. I'm also really excited about the presents I found for him and hopeful that he likes them.

So, here are the big 3-Day, Birthday Weekend plans:

Saturday:
Riding our bikes to the Aquarium, going to the Yard House for lunch, then taking the Metro back. The Metro is now one of Ian's favorite things, as he takes it to work everyday and has discovered that unlike when he's sitting in traffic in his truck, he can read while he commutes!

After all that fun, we're headed out to Sam's birthday party at the Pirate Park, which also promises to be great!

Sunday:
Church, naturally, and then to see a movie. This was the original plan to celebrate his birthday, as we rarely see movies in the theatre. The Aquarium plan came as an afterthought because we have free tickets. Anyway, after the movie, we're off to dinner at La'Creperie, a great romantic place on 2nd Street, with beer that Ian loves.

Monday:
Having the whole family over! It will be the first time that my whole family comes over at one time (we're also celebrating Sheila and Eric's birthdays), and with Ian's sister and her family coming as well, it should be a great time! I got a little pool for the kids, we'll grill and eat lots of chips (another Ian favorite) and have a super fun time. I really can't wait. Well, I can wait, but I'm very excited!

I will try to take a picture or two, so as not to lose the interest of my faithful readers, so stay tuned!